Thoughts - Matthew 11:28

“Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.”
- Matthew 11:28

The Christian life, as commonly understood, can be an extremely busy one. The business of saving souls demands a lot of giving by a lot of people. Even in the Bible, the working, giving nature of the Faith is repeatedly stressed, leading to innumerable discussions of spiritual gifts, methods of evangelism, varieties of social ministry, whole laundry lists of church activities, and so on, and so on, and so on. It leads to a lot of exciting work, and even more exciting results. It also leads to incredible fatigue.

Which is why a lesson that I learned myself only a couple weeks ago continues to stick out so prominently in my mind. I've been very busy lately doing God's work, both in direct ministry and in getting things together to continue following His calling on my life. It's all good stuff, but, after one particularly eventful weekend, I was completely exhausted.

My automatic response to this, being a good Christian, was to pray. And God answered, by providing for me an extremely refreshing nap. As I woke up later, He reminded me of the main verse for today.

OK, I realize that it wasn't the most exciting story. Even so, remarkably, the experience has significantly modified my view of the Christian life, by showing me a couple truths I had missed. Or possibly ignored.

First, for all of our “doing”, Christ's goal was to give us rest, not burden us with work. “I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” (John 10:10) - sounds more like joy than toil. The old system of the law gave us an unbearable burden, and the Jews literally worked themselves into exhaustion attempting to pull it. Christ alone could pull the load, and He invited us (Matthew 11:29-30) to come along with Him, so He could pull it instead of us.

Second, even more basically, Christ's goal was to give. It's true that “It is more blessed to give than to receive.” (Acts 20:35) But realize that, with God, there's very little we can give. Beyond that, if no one receives, then giving comes to a halt. To the audience Jesus was addressing, the problem was in getting people to give. In the Church today, far too often, the opposite issue rears its head: we get so caught in giving that we refuse to receive, even from God.

Now, this in no way reduces the commands of Scripture or the demands of life with God and in the Church. There are a lot of things we are to do, and those are good things. The problem is, we get focused on the to-do lists, and forget about both God and ourselves. God's first concern is for His children – He loves us and wants to take care of us. And, honestly, we need His care. Only when we'll allow Him that access will we have what it takes to minister to others.

Put another way: the point of the Christian life is the two-way relationship with God. Commune with Him and receive from Him, and you can do great things through Him. Concentrate on the “stuff”, however sanctified, and you'll be hopelessly drained.

“And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.”
- Philippians 4:19

Happy Boxing Day!

I just wanted to be the first to wish everyone a happy Boxing Day. This blog being based in and catered to the USA, I'm not exactly sure what anyone will be doing to celebrate this august day, but I wish you well in whatever celebratory activities you may undertake.

Just a note, though: from my understanding, "Boxing" here does not refer to the sport. So, if your plans involve giving someone in the supermarket a celebratory uppercut, you may want to reconsider. Just a thought.

Nathan

Merry Christmas!

Sages, leave your contemplations,
Brighter visions beam afar;
Seek the great Desire of nations,
Ye have seen His natal star:
Come and worship, come and worship,
Worship Christ, the newborn King.

- James Montgomery

A Poem

This appears to be an evening for poetry by the members of the Triumvirate (see here and here). Unfortunately, though, I'm not in a particularly poetic mood. So, rather than attempt to force one, I think I'll post one that I've previously composed.

Yes, my poem is devotional. Don't act so surprised!


The day was closing dark and dreary
The wind was howling, the rain, it poured.
Yet as I watched this, soft and slowly,
A song of praise came to the fore.
The song did nothing to the scen'ry,
It stayed as wretched as before,
But in my eyes, the darkened green'ry,
Was in that moment all transformed:
What had before been gath'ring gloom,
That all within its grasp would capture,
Was suddenly made to assume,
A portal to God's next adventure.

The song that worked this curious act,
Did not address the stormy weather -
Its power indeed was in the fact
That it ignored it altogether.
This song, it took no heed of hap'nings
It stayed the same through thick and thin,
Reminded me of brighter evenings,
And made my joy to surge within.

Oh Lord, You are forever constant,
You changeth not from year to year,
My life may change within an instant,
So precious Christ please hold me near.
And like a song which bears within
Light from outside my present view,
Be Thou to me a Heav'nly hymn,
Let all I see and hear be You!

Thoughts - John 11:16

"So Thomas, called the Twin, said to his fellow disciples, 'Let us also go, that we may die with Him.'"
- John 11:16

This came up in a Bible Study yesterday. There was a point to it, but it kind of got lost. And it shall stay lost, as I think this verse is extremely interesting in its own right.

If you're like me, you're already quite familiar with the context of this story. Jesus is out teaching, and He hears that His friend Lazarus is sick. He waits for a couple of days, and then decides to head to Bethany to see about healing (at this point, actually, raising) Lazarus.

Now, the problem with going to Bethany is that Bethany is within the region known as Judea. And the muckity-mucks of Judea are quite convinced that Jesus needs to die. These folks, however, are not mere thinkers - they also have the influence and drive to help Jesus meet His Maker (logical quandary intended) in an expeditious manner. With this in mind, the disciples try to dissuade Him from this mission - first stating the fact (v. 8) and then arguing the necessity of the trip (v. 12). Thomas put an end to the discussion with his statement, noted above.

There are a couple interesting elements of Thomas' statement. First, Thomas has very little hope here. He's pretty sure Jesus is going to die on this trip, and the rest of the group may join Him. The annoyance and resignation in his voice is almost palpable in the text.

Second, however, Thomas never questions following Christ. He's pretty sure they're all going to die, and yet he chooses to still go with Jesus. The level of dedication felt here by Thomas is simply amazing. The fact that no one sees fit to argue with him seems to indicate that the feeling was mutual.

Now, if this were a happy Sunday School lesson, everything would turn out peachy, and the disciples would learn to trust God to keep bad things away. The problem is, that isn't what happened. The irony of this whole story, you see, is that Thomas and the other disciples were right - although it took a couple stops, it was on this trip into Judea that Christ was captured, tried, and crucified!

What do we make of this, then? I think there are a couple important points. First, it's not inappropriate to think rationally about your actions - what the disciples deduced as happening did, in fact, happen in part. Second, though, they recognized that their reason had to be subservient to their priorities - they were going to go with Christ, whether it seemed smart or not. Third, when they did this, God gave them neither what reason nor hope would have expected - instead, He gave them infinitely more, a place in the founding of His Church!

Someone Else's Thoughts

"The Christian's God does not consist merely of a God Who is the author of mathematical truths and the order of the elements. That is the portion of the heathen and Epicureans. He does not consist merely of a God Who extends His providence over the life and property of men so as to grant a happy span of years to those who worship Him. That is the portion of the Jews. But the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, the God of Jacob, the God of the Christians is a God of love and consolation: He is a God Who fills the soul and heart of those whom He possesses: He is a God Who makes them inwardly aware of their wretchedness and His infinite mercy: Who unites Himself with them in the depths of their soul: Who fills it with humility, joy, confidence and love: Who makes them incapable of having any other end but Him."
- Blaise Pascal, Pensees, fragment 556

Thoughts - 1 Corinthians 3:14

"If the work that anyone has built on the foundation survives, he will receive a reward."
1 Corinthians 3:14

I'm in a rebellious mood theologically, so be prepared for some interesting “Thoughts” in the near future. It's not that I want to cause trouble, but I'm increasingly seeing being built up in my mind an image of Christianity that is utterly different from what I've grown up with. And I think much of it started with the passage I want to tell you about today.

This is a passage that I've heard many times before, but never actually understood. Let me reproduce part of it, so we're on the same page:

“Now if anyone builds on the foundation with gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, straw- each one's work will become manifest, for the Day will disclose it, because it will be revealed by fire, and the fire will test what sort of work each one has done. If the work that anyone has built on the foundation survives, he will receive a reward. If anyone's work is burned up, he will suffer loss, though he himself will be saved, but only as through fire.” (1 Cor. 3:12-15)

The meaning of this passage, as I've heard it described, goes like this: the foundation is one's salvation through Christ. We build upon this by our actions – gold, silver, and precious stones symbolizing our deeds of righteousness, and wood, hay, and straw denoting our evil deeds. Thus, at the Judgment (“the Day”), that life will be tried, and it will be seen whether one has put his or her salvation to good use, or has squandered it. In either case, what is left (in other words, how much good one has done) will determine the quality of our eternal life: although all who have the foundation will be saved, those who put poor workmanship into it will (logically) receive less of a reward to carry into eternity than will those who worked hard at it.

There's a severe problem with this interpretation, though: we've misidentified what's being built. What we generally pull from this fits nicely with our American individualism, so we're happy with it Unfortunately, though, in so doing, I think we've completely missed the point. We need to look again, and see what the passage actually says.

The first piece of any building is the foundation, and it is this that defines what can be built. Build it too flimsily, and the edifice on top will come crashing down when the bottom fails apart underneath it. Build a giant foundation, and only a minor building on top of it, and you'll be ridiculed for poor planning. The lucky thing for us here is that Paul identifies the foundation of his building: Jesus Christ (v. 11). Interesting, though, that he mentions nothing more than that – it's Christ Himself, not salvation, or justification, or theology, or anything else. Him. And, by the by, that's a rather large foundation!

If the foundation determines the size of the building, then, this must be a large structure. And, like any large structure, it takes a lot of work, and a lot of workmen, to build it. Indeed, from verse 10, not just Paul is working on it. “Someone else” is building on what he started. But, beyond that, others are working on it, or else how would “each one take care how he builds upon it”? So, there is a whole group, of indeterminate size, apparently involved in this project.

Well, now, we're going to run into an issue pretty quick. For, you see, in verse 12, it is apparent that Paul is addressing his remarks on building with quality materials to this group. But these fine folks are building a single building, not a collection of buildings. And, if that's the case, each one can't logically be working on just himself. There has to be one overall edifice that they're collaborating on.

And, in fact, there is, according to verse 9: the Church. The Church, not as an institution, but as a community of people. In verse 16, Paul writes “Do you not know that you are God's temple...?” The 'you' there is plural – literally, “all y'all”. It's a community composed of individuals, yes, but addressed as a cohesive whole and not as a group of atomic units thrown together. And it is that group that is the subject of this work.

Now, one more point, and then the conclusion should resolve itself pretty easily. It could be argued that Paul is only addressing the evangelists of the time – himself, Apollos, & co. The amount of space Paul gives to this discussion, though, and the tone convince me that this was only because the Corinthians were too busy with their infighting to have provided a worthwhile example, so Paul had to bring one in. The goal was for the Corinthians, and, by extension, all Christians, to join in the work.

That's a long path to a simple, yet staggering, conclusion. In the end, yes, each person's individual work will be judged. However, that work includes much more than his own spiritual state – it's what he's put into the building up of the Church. And the Church is so composed that building it up involves, requires, building people up. In other words, Paul's words here, rather than calling us to only improve ourselves for God's Kingdom, call us to improve our brothers and sisters as well. It's a work He sees as worthy of reward. But it's a work that living out will require a significant change in how you look at things.

Ponder that. And then try to live it. If you're like me, it may blow your mind. That's a good thing.

And, fair warning: unless God deters me, you ain't seen nothin' yet...

Thoughts - Mark 1:40-45

"Moved with pity, He stretched out His hand and touched him and said to him, 'I will; be clean.'"
- Mark 1:41

I've been remiss in this lately, and that's not going to be fixed in any great way here. I read this passage last night, though, and thought it worth sharing.

Mark is the earliest of the four gospels, and it starts off in a much simpler way than the others. Luke begins with a formal introduction, as befits the research project his gospel was. Matthew, written to the Jews, starts off with Jesus' ancestry, in that culture His bona fides. John has my favorite introduction, a mystical and philosophical description of all that the incarnation meant, borne of a special nearness to Christ and long years of reflection afterward.

In contrast, Mark just starts. It's all very brief - what takes Luke 3 chapters, Mark gives 11 verses. The general impression is of a whirlwind of activity - about the only individual He has time to talk to one-on-one is a demon-possessed man, and that's mainly to tell the demon to shut up.

In verse 40, however, that changes, and what made, and makes, Jesus different came to the fore. In that verse, the activity stopped. A leper came to Jesus, "imploring Him, and kneeling," (v. 40), with a faith and insight greater than many of his contemporaries, and yet with a humble request for healing.

Jesus could have ignored the man. He could have just spoken a word. But, as He looked at this poor man, He saw a deeper hurt than just his body. Leprosy was both physically destructive and highly contagious, which meant that those who had it lived in a perpetual quarantine. The leper lived as an outcast, human in theory but barred from any participation. You can imagine the hurts and longings within the man, far deeper than the physical disease. Not imagining that there could be any cure for that while his disease persisted, he sought out the One who could at least heal his body.

Jesus, however wasn't satisfied to just go half-way. He wanted to show the man that he was loved as he was, in his "unloveable" state. So, what did He do? He gently, but deliberately, reached out His hand, and touched the man. At that touch, dried skin crinkled and flaked off, and the man cringed from the pressure on his diseased flesh. But in that moment, his physical brokenness was replaced with spiritual wholeness, the overwhelming love of God flowing into his soul and washing away the years of hurt and loneliness. Then, only then, was Jesus ready to address his body.

If Calvary shows the love of God in power, this scene, to me, shows it in stillness. The savior of the world, God Incarnate, for a brief moment gave the most outcast of humanity His attention and acceptance, for no other reason than that He loved the man. To the crowd, it probably made little impression, but to that man, it meant everything.

In this is the essence of the Incarnation. Christ didn't choose to redeem us in a sterile environment, He didn't try to play things safe. Instead, He became a man so He could be right here in our gutter with us, to show us His love on a level we could understand and respond to. He made sure we knew that He saw the filth and squalor of our sin, and loved us anyway. Then, and only then, was He ready to pronounce the words, "I will; be clean," and save us. O that we might know the power of His touch, not just as God, but as man!

What I'm Learning

"The fear of the LORD leads to life:
Then one rests content, untouched by trouble."
- Proverbs 19:23

Some may recall, from way back when, that I've been trying to figure out what God's been up to in my life. Because, back in May, He put me at home when that was the one place I didn't want to be. I've been asking Him for several months to explain this to me. And I think I have a partial answer now.

Basically, I think it's about two things: contentment and trust. I'd been getting shades of the latter for a couple weeks or so now, but the first only really struck me today.

When I looked at the prospect of co-oping, I wanted one of two things. I could have taken staying near RPI, and enjoying being able to spend as much time as possible with my friends (some of whom have become adopted family) there. Failing that, I wanted to be by myself, to think, to relax, to spend my evenings reclining on a couch with a hot cup of tea, cozy and content. I didn't want to be at home, sitting in the midst of organized chaos.

Don't get me wrong - I love my family very much. I've just been away long enough to be out of the swing of things, so being at home tends to swing me between being worn out in the excitement or bored in the recuperative periods. The main reason for this being that, while the rest of the family, having not disappeared to Troy for a year, have things going on, I don't. In all actuality, I didn't when I left either, but I was blissfully ignorant then, and I'm not now. Independence is addicting.

Realizing this, at least dimly, home didn't exactly seem like an enticing plan. But that's where God put me. So, in the midst of complaining, I asked Him to show me why. Part 1 was Grandpa's death. After that, though, I tried to get to Troy for the Fall, and was stymied again, so I knew something else was up. It took me a while, but now I'm here, with at least a theoretical knowledge of the point.

And the point, it seems, was to teach me a lesson about life with God. Basically, it boils down to this: God is what matters. Have Him, and you can be content in any circumstance. Lack Him, and even you heart's desire will leave you feeling empty. It's Christ's classic formula: "For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it." (Matt. 16:25)

This, this here, is where Trust comes in. To have what I want, and what, in fact, God has given me, and to turn around and give that up seems extremely irrational. Even if that's what God's told me to do, it seems crazy. But by what other method could He teach us to trust Him, than by asking us to lay on the altar His gifts to us. He did it with Abraham and Isaac on Mount Moriah (Genesis 22:1-19). When Abraham gave to God his most prized gift, God returned it, and in so doing wrought a transformation in Abraham. Indeed, according to James 2:21, it was for this act that Abraham was declared righteous.

What Abraham did required total trust in God. Trust that God had a plan, and that He could and would preserve His word and work to Abraham's good. And one that was active, shown to be alive because it compelled action. And it was that trust that was rewarded.

Thankfully, God hasn't placed me in such an extreme scenario. In fact, it's relatively benign. Living at home, while not what I wanted, isn't exactly a hardship. And I haven't been completely separated from the happenings in Troy, nor been cut off from relaxing completely. But the point remains the same: as the proverb says, contentment rests on the fear of the Lord - obeying His leading. The rest is in His hands - there is no better place!

The Poem

Now that the full story has come out, and my part in the entire scheme has been revealed (for those not aware, this was a practical joke that I participated in, but didn't organize), here's a link to the poem:

http://secret.or.not.admirer.googlepages.com/

Thoughts Upon the Close of the Fiscal Year

Take my life, and let it be
Consecrated, Lord, to Thee;
Take my moments and my days,
Let them flow in ceaseless praise,
Let them flow in ceaseless praise.

Take my hands, and let them move
At the impulse of Thy love;
Take my feet, and let them be
Swift and beautiful for Thee,
Swift and beautiful for Thee.

Take my voice and let me sing
Always only for my King;
Take my lips, and let them be
Filled with messages from Thee,
Filled with messages from Thee.

Take my silver and my gold,
Not a mite would I withhold:
Take my intellect, and use
Ev'ry pow'r as Thou shalt choose,
Ev'ry pow'r as Thou shalt choose.

Take my will, and make it Thine;
It shall be no longer mine:
Take my heart, it is Thine own;
It shall be Thy royal throne,
It shall be Thy royal throne.

Take my love, my Lord, I pour
At Thy feet its treasure store:
Take myself, and I will be
Ever, only, all for Thee,
Ever, only, all for Thee.

-Frances R. Havergal

Thoughts = Math.Random()

As you may have noticed, my posting has become increasingly eclectic in content of late. It's not just my writing - it's my mind right now. Not sure why.

This was pointed out poignantly tonight. In the PHD Comic (phdcomics.com) for 9/27, which I saw this evening, there's an apparently random number on a computer screen. Except it's not random - it's actually pi/2. And, yes, I did notice this on my own. Not sure what to make of it, but I haven't figured out an explanation that bodes well for me yet.

God is still good. But I do wish I knew His goal in this time of listlessness is. All in good time.

Ecclesiastes 3:11 says "He has made everything beautiful in its time." This is followed by verses 12 and 13: "I perceived that there is nothing better for them than to be joyful and to do good as long as they live; also that everyone should eat and drink and take pleasure in all his toil--this is God's gift to man." Perhaps this is the lesson - to discover joy, not in either the wonderful or the depressing things of life, but in the swirling mass that results when the two mix together. If so, I hope I learn quickly, but I have a sinking feeling that this is a lesson only learned with patience...

All the way my Saviour leads me;
What have I to ask beside?
Can I doubt His tender mercy,
Who thro' life has been my Guide?
Heav'nly peace, divinest comfort,
Here by faith in Him to dwell!
For I know, whate'er befall me,
Jesus doeth all things well;
For I know, whate'er befall me,
Jesus doeth all things well.

All the way my Saviour leads me,
Cheers each winding path I tread,
Gives me grace for ev'ry trial,
Feeds me with the living bread.
Though my weary steps may falter,
And my soul athirst may be,
Gushing from the Rock before me,
Lo! a spring of joy I see;
Gushing from the Rock before me,
Lo! a spring of joy I see.
-Fanny Crosby

Terra Beata

The Latin phrase Terra Beata means, roughly, "blessed earth." It's the name of the the tune to "This is My Father's World." Looking through my photos, I realize I'm blessed to be living in a truly beautiful place, and thought I'd share some of it with you.

Some may say this isn't half as pretty as Troy. Those people have been breathing too much smog. Brunswick is nice, though, but it doesn't have the same variety - with the exception of the field, which is by my church, all the pictures are within walking distance of the house.

Anyway, enjoy!

Funniness

On a completely different note...

Reading an article tonight, saw another article referenced, a review of the second version of a middle-school textbook. The title of the article is, I think, great:

"The Puffins Don't Help; the Book Is Still Trash"

I get the feeling the author didn't like it.

Thoughts - September 7, 2006 - 1 Kings 19:9

"'What are you doing here, Elijah?'"
1 Kings 19:9 ESV


Crazy but true, I've decided that I need to keep going with Elijah's adventure here. Why? Because I find it fascinating. Mainly because there is so much depth here, yet it doesn't make sense at first blush.

If you remember, we left off as Elijah, powered by God, reached Mount Horeb, a.k.a. Mount Sinai. Having come to Sinai, he found a cave, and set up camp. Now, God knew he was coming. In fact, based on verse 7, I don't think it would be stretching things to suggest that God sent him there. So, with that being the case, one is forced to wonder: why are God's first words to the poor guy there "What are you doing here, Elijah?"

If God had called Elijah to Horeb, then the way many Americans would read this question, as an accusation - "Why aren't you where I told you to be?" - doesn't work. Instead, the point of the question seems to be to get Elijah to think, and beyond that to take possession of the experience. In other words, God wasn't satisfied with just taking Elijah and restoring him, as if he were a machine to be wound back up and sent out. He wanted to cooperate with Elijah, to participate with him is his restoration. What this meant, of course was that Elijah had to establish what he wanted.

Unfortunately, it's at this point that I think Elijah made a crucial mistake. Rather than consider God's question, he replied with the statement he'd been planning on making for the last 40 days. Not that what he said wasn't for the most part true (although there is some exaggeration), but he failed to actually answer the question. He was too busy making his complaint to consider why God had brought him so far to ask such a simple question, which was in fact profound. In other words, he got too caught up in himself to stop to consider God's plan.

What happened next is one of those scenes that can be read hundreds of times without ever losing its ability to instill awe. Quite simply, God showed up! It's interesting, though, how He did it, as even in His method He made a point. The things that came before Him, the wind, and earthquake, and fire, recall to the mind to events of chapter 18, with fire falling from heaven, and great drought-ending storms blowing in. Amazing displays of God's power, but not God Himself. Elijah had seen God act in these events, but seeing Him act wasn't (and isn't) the same as meeting Him. What he needed was a whisper.

Why a whisper? Because it demands stillness and intimacy to be heard. It doesn't allow one to move, for the very rustling of one's clothes can be enough to drown it out. And one must draw close to hear clearly what is being said. In other words, to put it theologically, God's whisper was a call to Elijah to commune with Him.

Unfortunately, it is apparent that Elijah's heart kept him from this communion. Because he refused to follow God's plan, he was left unchanged by the experience. When asked again in verse 13, by that whisper, why he was there, he gave the exact same answer. Nothing to him had changed.

Now God still took care of Elijah. He answered his complaint, and provided Elisha as a helper. And Elijah, by God's grace, continued his prophetic work. But I am forced to wonder what Elijah missed in this experience. Had he abandoned his own agenda, and sought only to follow God's will, what power, what grace, what promises might have been his? We will never know.

I believe that God often asks us that same question when we come to Him: "What are you doing here?" May we be willing, when He asks, to stop in our tracks and examine ourselves, and in so doing to place our hearts in a place where He can touch them! It's only then that we can hear and respond to the whisper, within which is God's method to restore and empower our souls.

Thoughts - August 27 - 1 Kings 19:4

"It is enough; now, O Lord, take away my life, for I am no better than my fathers."
1 Kings 19:4 ESV


If you open up your Bible and turn to the vicinity of our key verse, you'll probably recognize some of the events around this passage. Just before this is Elijah's famous battle with the prophets of Baal at Mount Carmel, when Elijah and God set Israel straight on who was God and who wasn't in a rather clear and decisive manner. From there, Elijah declared an end to the long drought in the land, and saw it come to pass. Unfortunately, this was followed by the queen Jezebel, who wasn't particularly nice, sending some rather nasty threats to Elijah. And, in spite of the anticipated spiritual high at this point, Elijah got scared out of his wits and ran. After running for a day out into the wilderness, he stopped and uttered the cry that is our key verse.

There is a very traditional sermon that begins much like this. It's all about seeing things through God's eyes, or something like that. If you've been to church enough, you've heard it, and you know that Elijah gets a pretty bum rap for appearing to give up on God after everything that's happened. Let me submit to you that this interpretation is incorrect.

Why is that reading incorrect? For one simple reason: what Elijah did was absolutely correct! To see why, let's examine what he actually said. He makes two statements here, first, "It is enough", and, second, "I am no better than my fathers", and from that a conclusion and request, "now, O Lord, take away my life".

"It is enough" is kind of brief. For Elijah, it was even more so - in Hebrew, it's one word, rab. (More than you ever wanted to know about it here) But it was a simple and profound statement of his condition. Basically, what he's saying here is "I've had all I can take." It's the same phrase God uses in 2 Samuel 24:16, when He stops the destruction of Israel because He can't stand to see any more. And Elijah was definitely right - over the course of a couple of days, he'd challenged an entire nation, crippled a religion, outrun a chariot, and then topped it off with a day's trip in the desert. And now he was physically, emotionally, and spiritually spent, and he knew it.

He followed this with "I am no better than my fathers." "Fathers" here could refer to his physically ancestry, or it could refer to the prophets that had come before him. And there is truth in both sides. First, in the light of the acts of God he had just witnessed, his own imperfection and sinfulness was readily apparent. All the thing he had done for God, while good, hadn't made him significantly better than his countrymen - he too had sinned, so that it's easy to understand him saying, like Paul later would, "Wretched man that I am! Who will deliver me from this body of death?" (Romans 7:24) Second, at least from his view, he had accomplished his divine mission as well as the prophets of old had. Which, considering how deep into apostasy Israel was, wasn't particularly well. In spite of all he had done for God, all he still saw was rebellion (see v. 10). So, basically, he acknowledged his utter incompetence for the task he had been appointed to.

With these in mind, it's little wonder that his request to God was to let him die - he had given his all, and was found wanting still. He had utterly failed in his God-given task, and had nothing left with which to try again. Truly a depressing state to be in. But Elijah's wisdom was two-fold: he was completely, simply, and utterly honest about his condition, and in his honesty submitted himself to the will and care of the one Person who could address his needs.

What's truly interesting, beyond that, is what happened afterward. God didn't come and give Elijah a pep talk. Nor did He send a messenger come to cheer him with good tidings from Israel. In the face of absolute honesty, the Lord was quiet, for in fact He had nothing to add or correct. What He did do, however, was begin to provide Elijah with what he needed to be restored. God wasn't going to meet with His prophet in the middle of the wilderness. Instead, He gave Elijah what he needed to come to Him. And, thus strengthened by God's care, Elijah went, not north back to Israel, but south, "to Horeb, the mount of God." (v. 8)

Thoughts - August 24 - Isaiah 43:19

"Behold, I am doing a new thing;
now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?"
(Isaiah 43:19)


You may not know this, but I enjoy taking passages like this, that are often seen out of context, and putting them back into it. It's not that the interpretation is necessarily wrong, but it is incomplete.

In this whole portion of the book of Isaiah, God is giving Israel this amazing two-sided message. First, they're a bunch of rebellious evildoers who should know better. See, for example, 42:18-20, "Hear, you deaf, and look, you blind, that you may see! Who is blind but my servant, or deaf as my messenger whom I send? Who is blind as my dedicated one, or blind as the servant of the Lord?" Basically, the chosen people, rather than being heralds of God's truth, were not just as bad as the nations around them, but worse, since they should have known better.

At the same time, though, out of His unspeakable love, God had chosen to forgive and redeem them. In 43:25, one can almost feel His anguish over them and their refusal to acknowledge Him: "I, I am He, who blots out your transgressions for my own sake, and I will not remember your sins." Verse 12: "I declared and saved and proclaimed, when there was no strange god among you" to confuse you as to Who it was!

So, as our key verse says, God had decided on a new approach. Even though Judah had ignored His many, many appeals to them, He refused to give up. Being a smart guy, He knew that the same old, same old wouldn't work. So, out of His love, he went back to the drawing board. And came up with Babylon.

Now, if you're going to be corrected by the Creator, you generally want Him to speak to you and tell you. If that doesn't work, or if you're part of a large group on the same wrong path, a prophet might be nice. What you probably don't want is for a foreign nation to come in, destroy your land, and carry you off into exile!

Israel's history shows that this isn't what God wanted either. He tried for centuries to reach them in the nice way, but it just didn't work. So, did He finally tire of them and abandon them? No! He gave them what they needed, and, further, promised His help while they went through it and recovered from it (43:1-7).

Now, did it work? Somewhat. Judaism since then has been much closer to God in the millennia since then than it was before. Did it work perfectly? No - when God Himself, in Christ, came to fully claim His own, they rejected Him. But even that wasn't the last straw for them, either. Though they were destroyed again in A.D. 70, the last century has witnessed yet another restoration of Israel, and with it a significant number of the Jews finding Christ.

I would submit to you that there is a definite parallel to this in our lives. God will try to speak to you and correct you as gently as possible, because He loves you. If you ignore Him in that, though, He won't abandon you; because He loves you, He may turn up the heat. But, if He does, He'll get you through it, too, and you will come out on the other end.

So, if you're going through a time of trial, turn to Him, and see if He's trying to get through to you. If you're not, but you've been trying to ignore Him, rethink that plan before He has to try a little harder. And, in whatever happens, trust Him - He really does love you!


"When through fiery trials thy pathway shall lie,
My grace all-sufficient shall be thy supply;
The flame shall not hurt thee; I only design
Thy dross to consume, and thy gold to refine."
- Hymn, "How Firm a Foundation"

Thoughts - August 22 - Revelation 21:6

I'm going to call these "Thoughts", at least for now. I'm not sure I'm quite up to writing "Devotions" yet. And, hey, if I am, the little extra dose of humility might not be a bad thing either...


"And He said to me, 'It is done! I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. To the thirsty I will give from the spring of the water of life without payment." (Rev. 21:6)


I was surprised reading over some of what I've written over the past few months how much I've focused on change. The more I consider it, the more I find that change is very interesting, because it's a continuing process: each end always holds a new beginning, and each new beginning bears the seeds of an end. The cycle self-perpetuates, and the only way to attempt to avoid it is to stretch out the period of time between beginnings and ends. Some try to do this by never beginning anything at all, and, while I suppose this may work, it seems like a miserable way to live. Others grasp the now for all it's worth, trying desperately to keep pushing the end off. This is, unfortunately, a losing battle. So what are we to do?

It's in that spirit that I've considered this rather well-known passage from Revelation. It's an awe-inspiring statement, signaling the end of Earth and Heaven as we know them, and the inauguration of our eternity with Christ. But I want to pull out a couple of details.

First, He is. It doesn't read 'I was the Alpha and will be the Omega.' It says "I am"! It echoes Christ's "Before Abraham was, I am." (John 8:58) To Him, the beginning and the end are both in the present - "I am God, and there is none like me, declaring the end from the beginning and from ancient times things not yet done," (Isaiah 46:9-10)

Second, He's not an end, or a beginning - He's THE beginning and end. There's no beginning before Him, and no ending after Him. And, since to Him both exist at once, all the individual beginnings and ends converge towards those two poles, that are both Him.

Now, any RPI-type person who reads this will realize the implication quickly. By the Squeeze Theorem, if the beginnings and the ends each converge to God, then those things between them, which would include all events, must also converge to Him. In other words, "From Him and through Him and to Him are all things," (Rom. 11:36), including the events of our lives. Whether in the hard turning points of change or in the smoother times in between, we are always near to God.

If this is, then the case, then in whatever happens, we have a promise to live on. For the One who declares His omnipresence, in His very next statement, invites us to drink in the fullness of life with Him: "To the thirsty I will give from the spring of the water of life without payment." The promise is not only real - it's the gateway to all that God has in store for us!

Coming Soon!

Just to forewarn/excite you, I'm toying with the idea of posting a semi-regular devotional on here. Mainly to help me work out odd thoughts that strike me in my scripture reading, but perhaps also to edify others. If you're interested, stay tuned. I may even start tonight, depending on what happens.

Have fun!

Three Months Later...

Wow. I haven't posted in over three months. You'd think I was busy or something...

I never would have imagined back in May what was going to happen. And, in fact, it's just as well. Those whom I was honest with back in April and May knew that there was one place I did not want to end up at for the summer. And, much like ol' Jonah in the Old Testament, that one place was exactly where God sent me. Fortunately, unlike Jonah, it wasn't a bad place; it just wasn't where I wanted to be. For, you see, God made my plans fall apart, and in the end I found myself at home.

There were two reasons I wanted to avoid Florida. The first was the risk to the independence I had gained and learned to treasure during my time at RPI. Not independence to party wildly or do other various and sundry stupidity - that's not me. Rather, it was the freedom to determine my own schedule, to go where and when I wanted, to enjoy people, and to avoid people when I'd had enough. None of which really happens at home. Not that there's anything wrong or pushy with my family, but six people in one house makes the trampling of one's freedom a given. Plus, and I'll be completely honest, there was more than a little pride involved, too, that I was able to "make it" without my folks.

Beyond that, as previously stated, there were people too. RPI friends and church friends, all of whom I also love dearly. While I'd never attempt to denigrate familial love, there's something about love chosen that makes it much more compelling in everyday life. Maybe it's because the love of friends hasn't had nearly as long to solidify, so that it seems so much easier to lose. I don't know. What I do know, however, is that the only thing that still makes me unhappy about the situation is missing them as much as I do.

God has shown me, though, that He's had a plan. My Grandpa passed away last month, after fighting a losing battle in the hospital for a couple weeks. Had I been in Massachusetts, the whole thing would've been torture: even had I been able to get back and forth easily, I wouldn't have had the flexibility to take far more time off than a temp should to support my family. At home, working with my old boss, who's extremely good to me, it wasn't an issue. At all.

Beyond that, He's given me the chance to get some interesting things done at church. Things like actually participating in the eMinistries committee, learning more of the ins and outs of website work, continuing to try to get the website moving (almost there!), getting to know some people better, and exploring some new opportunities. Why I'm doing all of this here, and not helping to save a dieing church in Troy, I don't know.

He's also been working on the aforementioned pride, although I've still got some learning to do, based on the last sentence of the previous paragraph!

And, last but not least, He's been good to me with my friends. I haven't managed to keep up with all of them, but I've done a lot better than my usual number, which is ~0. AIM, GoogleTalk, and Skype are wonderful things. Blessings, in fact.

Oh, and believe it or not, I've used the telephone once or twice, and even snailmail. Rather low-tech, I admit, and I imagine there'll be some penance due for it when I return to RPI. Not sure what that would be, though. Maybe 39 lashes with a wet Cat5 cable?

Anyway, now comes the really fun part. Because, you see, I needed a co-op for the Fall. I tried to get back to Troy, and have ended up yet again - you guessed it - at home. I'm confident that God has a plan. And, knowing Him, it'll be amazing. All told, one never loses by following Christ's path.

"For whoever would save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for my sake will find it." (Matthew 16:25 ESV) If life itself, then how much more the details of it!

Have fun!

Beginnings and Ends, Continued

The last post was a bit fragmented - I had a lot to say and a lot swirling around inside my head to sort out. It's still not quite settled, but I realized that I had a point to make that I never got to. But, rather than try to reorganize the previous post, I'm going to try again here.

There's an "old Englih proverb" (which probably has a known source that's unknown to me) that says simply this: "All good things must come to an end." I'm realizing that's the case, even for really good things like this past semester. These things come to their end no matter how much we love them and no matter how much we try to hold onto them.

There's a reason, a point, to the good things ending, though: change. Change is a vital part of being human; in fact, we do it continually. And, because we change inside, we need changes outside to reflect, foster, and modify those internal changes. God made us beings in a constant state of transformation, and one of His tools for controlling it is the circumstances of our lives. Now, how He does that varies from person to person, but it's a certainty that He will, at least for those willing to allow Him to do so.

So, my point is that apparently some new phase of His work on me needs to commence. But doing that requires that the current phase be ended, despite my desperate wish to the contrary. And perhaps I need to be out of the way for a time to allow change in someone else's life. Or there may be something else afoot on the Boss's part. But, whatever it is (and it could be more than one - those aren't XOR's), it requires that I follow His leading to get there. Not that it's either easy or what I want to do. But, last I checked, those weren't in the brochure.

Someone once asked me what "peace" meant. I puzzled for a few minutes, and couldn't think of a good explanation, so I finally said something that, although it smelled of "complacency", almost fit. It was only after a lot of thought that I realized what the difference is between the two: complacency is being comfortable with where you are; peace is being comfortable with the One moving you along. Change is happening in my life. But I know the One who's guiding this whole thing, and I'm going to trust Him with it. Or at least I'm going to try to.

"Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee." Isaiah 26:3 (KJV)


In simple trust like theirs who heard,
Beside the Syrian sea,
The gracious calling of our Lord,
Let us, like them, without a word,
Rise up and follow Thee.

Drop Thy still dews of quietness,
Till all our strivings cease;
Take from our souls the strain and stress,
And let our ordered lives confess
The beauty of Thy peace.

Breathe through the heats of our desire
Thy coolness and Thy balm;
Let sense be dumb, let flesh retire;
Speak through the earthquake, wind, and fire,
O still, small voice of calm.

(Verses from the hymn "Dear Lord and Father of Mankind")

Ends, Beginnings, and the Spots In Between

So, the semester is over at RPI. Tonight I finish packing, and tomorrow I head home. The switch to IT has worked out really well, and I've had quite the time. I filed the paperwork today to officially switch departments, so hopefully that'll be approved by the Powers That Be next week. Beyond that, I'm happy to say that everything's done.

At the same time, I'm sad to see the semester end. I've grown a lot in the past few months, and learned more about IT, myself, and God than I ever thought possible. I've gained some amazing friends, and done some really cool (and some really inane) stuff. It's sad to watch us all go our separate ways - phone calls and AIM aren't a good substitute for actually being with people.

On a different note (but on the same minor chord), I have a summer and fall co-op, working for Avidyne Corporation, in Lincoln, MA. They have a couple of projects they need to have done, in addition to the day-to-day IT stuff. It should be interesting - it's my first actual IT job (or at least the first one that's officially IT and that I get paid for). At the same time, I'm a little disappointed, because there was a job in Troy that I really wanted to get but didn't. There's a number of things I'd like to be involved in here, including RPI things in the Fall, but, alas, it appears God has other plans. I'm sure they'll be good ones, but until I find out what they are, my outlook is a tad bittersweet.

One thing I can vouch for is that this whole God-directed life thing is quite the adventure. If it weren't for the fact that I know that He knows what He's doing, I'd probably be a lot more unhappy right now. But, as I once said to someone once who commented on the "convenience" of having God to run the universe for you, it's almost like a contract - He's the Boss, so I do what He tells me to do, and then it's His job to make sure the details work out. Unfortunately, He doesn't generally feel it necessary to give me all the details beforehand.

So, stay tuned for the adventures of Nate in Massachusetts. And news on the various projects I have planned for my evenings. This should be a most interesting next few months.

God is good!

Free e-Books

As promised (in person - we can apparently still communicate that way at RPI), here's a link to the University of Virginia's library of free e-books:

http://etext.lib.virginia.edu/ebooks/

By the way, The Last of the Mohicans was written by James Fenimore Cooper.

Still Truckin'

Hey, it's a Wednesday, and I'm still alive. Spring Break starts on Friday, and I can't wait to get home. It's been two months since I've been out of the Troy area - I'm ready for a break, even if it will include a fair amount of homework. At the midpoint of the semester, though, things are going pretty well, especially compared to last semester. So far, I'm busy enough without being overwhelmed, and I'm having a lot of fun. God's really being good to me.

Also, I found a link to an interesting article tonight. Enjoy.

It's Like a Breath of Fresh Air

There was a link to this site in a Townhall.com article today. The church put billboards up all over the area, and all they showed was the URL and four bare feet sticking out from between the covers (picture). I like the idea - it's bold, it's creative, and it probably made at least a few parishioners squirm in their seats.

Admittedly, the church may have been a little too provocative, but it beats the alternative most churches go with - keeping mum. Jesus wasn't afraid to openly take on the issues of His day, but we in the modern church seem to have gotten away from that idea, because it makes us "uncomfortable". Hopefully, things like this will start to change that - if we don't tell people the Good News about the whole of their life, who will?

Fun At RPI

Life at RPI is always an adventure, because the place seems to be a perpetual SNAFU. Today we had a rather nasty set of storms pass through, and one of the transformers got hit by lightening, taking out power to the majority of the residential campus. I was in my room at the time, and got to experience the whole thing first-hand. This is the second time this academic year we've had a transformer blow - the first being when someone tried to fix their toilet and instead flooded the building.

Personally, I love blackouts, so it wasn't too big a problem to me. It has elicited some interesting anecdotes, though. For example, the maintenance guy was telling me that, when it happened, one of the students came out to complain to him that his lights had gone out. The guy politely asked him to notice that the hallway he was standing in was rather dark, too. I'm not sure, but I think the complainer was probably an engineer.

Also, in the "I wish I was a fly on the wall" category, as I was walking to the Student Union (where I'm writing this), I passed a campus tour on its way up to show off the dorms. Apparently, no one told the tour guide the lights were dead. I almost wish I'd followed and watched.

The power will probably be on later, when I get back there. How disappointing - RPI's a lot more fun when things go wrong.

It's Been a While

I haven't written anything on here in quite a while. Things have been pretty busy, and I've fallen into the Jared Crocker mode of blogging. However, he's posted again, so I guess I should, too. Except that, as usual, I'll probably write more than him. I tend to do that.

First off, I've semi-officially switched academic fields. I'm out of Aeronautical Engineering, and into Information Technology. I needed to try Aero and see that it wasn't where I should be, but now that that torture's done it's good to be back where I should be. It's also a little bit scary, because, until recently, I'd viewed the CS stuff as kind of a stopover before I got into the engineering stuff. It's looking a lot more like a career now.

The interesting thing is that, officially, I'm still listed as an Aero. It worked out (and I credit God entirely for it, as it's rather unusual) that Aero needed me to fulfill its TA commitments, so they let me stay as an Aero major, get the TA job and pay from them, yet start the IT coursework. Which is good, because I would have been in rather dire financial straits had the TA-ship been cancelled. The official switch probably won't happen until after the end of the semester. The only problem with it, so far, has been some funny looks from IT class profs when they see that major listed on their classlists. IT is really an interesting program to be in, though. It's more of an interdisciplinary field than a subject in its own right - for example, this semester I'm taking three CompSci classes and a Decision Sciences class. Variety is a good thing.

Outside of academics, my life has been going pretty well. I'm busy as a bee, but it's with a lot of fun stuff. First off, obviously, is homework. I like IT homework a lot more than engineering homework - especially since it doesn't involve Differential Equations. The Alliance Church up here is still letting me play the piano, and I've also been playing with some electronic stuff there - messing with the sound equipment they have but don't use (it used to be a much larger congregation) and pushing for a website. I'm also keeping up my involvement in the campus's Intervarsity chapter, which is a nice way to have a mini-Nyack experience.

On a professional note, my first website went live last month, which was kind of exciting. I'd done the design over the summer, but it had been on hold until I got back for the Christmas break. It went up in January, and so far seems to be going over well. If you want to see it, it's at www.wvefc.org .

Looking forward, my big project is finding a co-op or job for the summer and fall. So far the search is going pretty well - I have a company that was recruiting on campus and seemed very interested in me (an avionics company called Avidyne - www.avidyne.com), and there's a faculty position at RPI opening up that I would have a pretty good chance at getting. God will work the right job out for me, I'm sure, but, until it's all set, I'd appreciate your prayers about it. Also, if you hear of anything that I might be interested in, I'd appreciate it if you'd let me know.

That's it for now. I haven't heard from anybody from Nyack in a while - are you guys still alive?

Later.

-Nathan